The reasons are many.....

*The kids are at home……and making my life barely worth living. School opened a week back but we haven’t started sending them to school coz of the swine flu factor. I was all for sending them but my better-half is a regular party-pooper....oh well he may just have a point.

*My brother-in-law is back home[he was in the US studying] after 2 years….I'm sure u can imagine how it is when you have to make all the 3 meals ……and that too on time.

*Its Ramadaan now & the better-half comes home a whole 4 hrs early. For the sake of domestic harmony I stay off blogger.

*It was our 10th anniversary last week of august & I wasted 2 whole days trying to drum up a sweet-sweet post. Seems like I exhausted my quota with this one. We sure had a good day though.

*As I sat poised to write, I remembered I had to reply to all your mails & comments, so quickly go about it…… atleast none of you can complain I haven’t replied.

*It was Onam last week & this year somehow I was not too enthused about doing anything….I was still in that ‘I miss my mama’ mode. But Bins, Deeps & Solilo made me feel like a lazybum & I created a Onam lunch which had 21 dishes if you count the salt & ghee[don’t you dare laugh, if you had organised that many dishes for a single lunch you’d count them too]. I haven’t recovered from the shock yet.

*As I was idly watching a program on tv about Teacher's Day I wondered if Indyeah posted anything on it. I quickly go there but you know how Indyeah’s page is ……..it takes ages to load[with all those video’s & paraphernalia]. By the time I read the whole post[nope she hadnt but there were other posts which I hadn't read], saw all the video’s, read all the comments, posted my own comment & clicked submit, Internet Explorer shuts down in protest which I took as a divine sign & got up to attend to household matters.

*It was Nikita’s birthday yesterday & am still digesting the fact that she’s eight years old now. It seems like yesterday she was chasing bupafies and wanting to be as tall as a jidaffe. Now she is attempting the Spelling Bee competition and while I’m teaching her the words I’m having mini attacks at the thought of her standing in front of everybody & trying to say it right.

*Enough is enough!!!! I make up my mind firmly & sit down with the intention of writing a post but my mouse has a will of its own & automatically clicks on Spider solitaire first. I keep playing & playing, convinced that the next game I’ll surely win. But all I do is waste time.

If I think harder I can think of more perfectly pedestrian reasons as to why I have not been posting. But the real truth is that I can’t think of a single subject to post about. The blog is always at the back of my mind but there is no particular subject appealing to my sense of wackiness.

Speaking of wackiness….. I thought Rakesh’s recent post was a brilliant take on a blogger's mindset………I guess every blogger at some point almost wishes something interesting would happen in his life just so that he can blog about it;-D.

So many of you called, emailed & commented asking if I’m okay, why I haven’t posted or haven’t been to your page. I’m really very sorry about that, it’s just that time is sort of flying. I’ve already started making amends. And with this post I hope to have broken the spell.

And Thank YOU for asking…..it really matters!!!!!!!!

In full flight

The flight to Bangalore is not something we are going to forget in a hurry …we had hours & hours[well ok I’m exaggerating a bit] of continuous turbulence & by the end of the 30th minute my better-half & I were half-resigned to the fact that we may be crashing into the Arabian sea. As the plane jerked & shuddered thru the black of the night, all my deepest fears magnified.

I fretfully wondered if they had enough life jackets if we had jump off into the ocean or was it going to be like the Titanic which carried just 20 lifeboats for 2,222 people. I even felt under my seat but there was nothing there. I thanked God for all his kindness & especially expressed my gratitude for the fact that we were kicking the bucket together…you know, as a family.
Thankfully the turbulence abated after 45 minutes & I fell asleep almost immediately, leaving my better-half to look at my peaceful posture in amazement. Yep, got up only when the pilot made his announcement to land & found him….. the husband, not the pilot, still shaking his head at my nonchalance.

In contrast, my flight back to Dubai was a piece of cake……..and that too, without the better half's moral support[he had left a week earlier].

The kids & I each had a tiny tv screen to ourselves & had some 55 channels to choose from…….aaaaah bliss. There was not a peek out of the kids except for when the pilot or airhostesses halted tv proceeding to say some irrelevant stuff ……I had to shush Naina quickly when she said loudly “ufff this pilot has no other wo…..”

Just once I had to take them to the loo. After Naina went back to the seat, Nikita came out of the loo with a white packet in her hand. I just about managed to glimpse ‘Sanitary Towel’ written on it before she skipped down the aisle. As I watched her go, the packet slipped out of her hand TWICE & both the times two good-looking fellas kindly picked it off the floor & gave it back to her with a quizzical look on their face & then automatically looked at me who was standing at the head of the aisle, transfixed. I had no intentions of going into the loo but the embarrassment was too much to bear. I dashed into the loo & stood there with both my hands on my head. Then curiousity got the better of me & I looked around that miniscule partition to see where in the heavens did Nikita get hold of that blasted thing in the less than a half-minutes time she was in.

I found it after a full minute right beside the commode[which explains how Nikita found it so easily] but try as I could I was not able to figure out how to open the panel. After some futile efforts I knew I had to stop hiding & get out of there. I got out, carefully placed my eyes on the aisle & walked directly to my seat. Just once I looked sideways & saw one of the ‘not so goodlooking anymore’ guy smirking. Idiot!!!!

I confiscated the packet from Nikita who luckily hadn’t opened it coz she was under the impression that it was one of those refreshing tissues. Then sat down to watch the remaining of “Billu Barber" to conclusion & compared it so wistfully with “Kadha Parayambol”, there was no comparison really. Sooner than I thought, the Tv screens froze to display landing announcements and I brightened up at the thought of going home but there were shouts of dismay from the kids who wanted the pilot to fly around for some more time so that they could finish the movie they were watching.

Finally as I got up to join the queue[all of you know what I’m talking about;-/] Nikita dives underneath the seat I presumed to gather her errant toys but she triumphantly places a white packet with LIFE JACKET written on it, on the seat. I was horrified & whisper fiercely to keep it back but she confidently refused to;
“That redlipstick lady on the tv said that we have to wear it when we leave the plane”.

“Yes she did, I heard it too” Naina stoutly supports.

"Yes I heard it too but only in the case of an emergency" whispering I look around hoping nobody saw what the kids did & find people behind me in the queue craning their heads to have a better look at the life-jacket.

I command Nikita to put it back where she found it & two out of the three of us exit the plane very mutinously.

As we walked down to passport control I couldn’t help grinning to myself…..atleast the doubt I had about whether they actually kept life-jacket under the seats was cleared, some comfort anyway”


p.s: Leaving you with a picture of Dubai taken from my seat which by the way was furtherest from the window[the kids wouldnt budge].

It took sometime to sink in that the giant band-aid-like thingie on the horizon was not some advertising gimmick but a sticker carefully stuck on the window by who-else. It had 'child-meal' printed on it;-/.

Wish me.....

The Ministry of Education in Dubai have extended the summer holidays by another month on account of Eid. So we've packed our bags & left to India;-D.

I dont really think I'm going to be able to post anything in the next few weeks.

Friends, take care & see you all when I get back.


Yours Bloggerly,
Nancy

p.s: If u want, u can wish me HAPPY HOLIDAYS;-D


p.p.s: If u dont, I'm gonna wish u a bloggers block for 3 years 365 days.

A scar scare

It started off as a tiny chicken pox scar but as time passed I noticed it growing. Five-six years later it was the size of a large bubblegum which had been chewed & rolled into a uneven round/ovalish shape. Luckily it was not visible to others so I didn’t get any awkward questions. It felt hard to the touch & didn’t pain when pinched….just like some hard tissue.

I was not unduly worried[or rather I pretended not to be..anything to avoid going to the doctors] but the better-half was not very happy with its existence. Time & again he would remind me to get it checked but I would stall saying I’d rather we get it checked in India.

So the next time we went to India I got it checked by a gynecologist who immediately suggested surgery & a biopsy. It was a 20-25 minutes procedure under anesthesia & went off without incident. I was so scared but went through it at my husband's insistence. The doctor prescribed antibiotics & a steroid cream to apply. I followed her instructions faithfully.

The biopsy didn’t show anything out of the ordinary & declared it a mass of dead cells accumulated together. The doc didn’t look surprised at all as she skimmed through the report. Again she just stressed that I apply the steroid cream regularly.

I came back to Dubai & started going to work & everything went on as usual except that the wound was not healing as fast as I expected. I called the doctor up to find out. She said there was absolutely nothing to worry & I should give the area atleast a month to heal since the lump scooped out went more than an inch inside the flesh. It was really irritating as it kept rubbing against the clothes & making it sore.

Round about the same time I happened to chance on Sayesha’s post which mentioned an interesting term called Keloid & the description sounded very familiar. I googled it immediately.

The description goes like this “A Keloid, sometimes referred to as a keloid scar, is a tough heaped-up scar that rises quite abruptly above the rest of the skin. They are irregularly shaped and tend to enlarge progressively. Unlike scars, keloids do not subside over time.”

I knew I hit gold. This keloid thingie was exactly what I had on me….so I read up everything I could on it. In short a keloid was an ugly looking mark which grew in size but was not dangerous at all. There was no point removing it because it grows back & worse, might become bigger. The only way to avoid it is to not let it happen…as in be very careful about piercings & such stuff.

Then it hit me. If a person like me who is totally ignorant about the medical field could get this much information, don’t you think the doctor would have known about it. At first I thought she must have made a genuine mistake but the more I thought about it & discussed with the better-half it became quite clear to us that there was no way the doctor did not know……the way she stressed about applying the steroid cream[to supress the growth] & other telling factors made it quite clear she knew. I got this keloid removed a few years back & it had cost me Rs.6000/- then & I remember the doctor got around Rs.3,500/- as fees. She is a well-known & busy gynecologist in our side of town, a consultant in 3 hospitals & has a full waiting room at her clinic every evening. I wonder what her need was, to put me through a useless surgical procedure. Even today I find it hard to believe that she did it just for the money.

Incase you are wondering, yes the keloid grew back…it grew back to the same size. Now that I know what it is I’ve grown quite fond of it. I pretend it is my kaala teeka*….all my childhood & teenage years I wanted the elders to put that kaala teeka on me but the prettier ones in the friends circle always got preference & ours being a Christian family my mum didnt believe in them. I firmly believe my body got fed of waiting & produced its own:-).

I no longer give it much thought but when I read A’s post 2 weeks back, for a moment there I was reminded of my own needless fears. And another reason I put this up is that I realize there will be many others like me who may have these distensions on them & panic into thinking the worst. Relax guys, it’s just a keloid.

To know more about keloids, go here

* Kala teeka: A black dot usually put by doting parents to avoid the 'evil eye'

Two in One Tag

Deeps tagged me to put my favourite photograph up in a post.

As you can see below both pictures are taken at the same spot but 3 years apart. Both my daughters for some strange reason used to love loitering around the water dispenser trying to figure out how the water came gushing out.

Sometimes when they thought nobody was looking they would crawl away at super speed to the kitchen, catch hold of the bottle for support & pull themselves up. After a few minutes I’d go behind them & pretend I cant find them…..I'd call out their names mournfully & then act most surprised that they were in the same room all the time. All that while they’d stand so still, watching my every move & when I pretend to find them they’d be so tickled & laugh delightedly.

Even today when I look at these pictures their infectious chuckles echo thru my mind :-).

I tag…

Ersa

The Idle Devil

Maddy

Ramesh

SJ

Sakshi

Savitha

Swaram

************************************************
Since the topic of the 2nd tag was related to the subjects in the 1st tag I thought I’ll finish it off in this post itself.....

Sindhu tagged me with a list of 20 some questions that you ask your kids, then you write up their responses as they say it & display the answers in your blog.

Mama: What is something I always say to you?
Nikita(8yrs): Talk softly.
Naina(5yrs): We must not interrupt when you are talking on the phone.

Me: Bingo ;-D

Mama: What makes me happy?
Nikita: When we eat all the food on our plate.
Naina: When we finish our holiday homework

Mama: What makes me sad?
Nikita: When we are not well-behaved.
Naina: When we don’t finish our holiday homework

Mama: How do I make you laugh?
Nikita: When you dance we want to laugh.
Naina: Yes chechi’s right

Me: Yep, I have two left feet

Mama:What do you think I was like as a child?
Nikita: You were responsible, correct????
Naina: You came first in class?????

Me:They have no clue;-D

Mama: How old am I?
Nikita: 30 years old
Naina: 30 years old

Me: For the past 5 years I’ve been 30 & intend to remain so for the next 20 years. After that if they insist I’ll be 31.

Mama: How tall am I?
Nikita: 75 inches.
Naina: taller than me

Me: Just like me, Maths is not their strong point.

Mama: What is my favourite thing to do?
Nikita: You like to work on the laptop
Naina: You like to watch “Burrey bhi hum, bhale bhi hum” on Star plus

Me: These kids I tell you, will let out all my secrets....ummm anybody here who watches that serial;-D????

Mama: What do I do when you’re not around?
Nikita: Cook
Naina: Work hard

Me: Heeeeeeee………I work hard to keep that image.

Mama: If I become famous, what will it be for?
Nikita: singing
Naina: for watering plants

Me: Huh…….

Mama: What am I really good at?
Nikita: you know the wonderfulest songs
Naina: you are good at working hard

Me: Nikita is talking about the silly songs I make up on the spot to the tune of popular nursery rhymes;-D

Mama: What am I not really good at?
Nikita: You are not good at waking up in the nights.
Naina: You are not good at playing with us.

Me:Heeeeeeee……:-D

Mama: What is my job?
Nikita: You used to have a job once a upon a time but not now.
Naina: working on the laptop.

Mama: What is my favourite food?
Nikita: Laddoos
Naina: Chicken biriyani

Me: They had a tough time deciding coz I eat everything with the same intensity

Mama: What makes you proud of me?
Nikita: When you do everything for us
Naina[cunningly]: When you buy toys for us

Me:Opportunists;-/

Mama: What makes me proud of you?
Nikita: When we are well-behaved
Naina: when I do my work well & teacher gives me 3 golden stars

Mama: What do you and I do together?
Nikita: Taking photographs.
Naina: Cuddling

Mama: How are we the same?
Nikita: We are both the same colour.
Naina: We both love to eat chicken at Nando’s

Mama: How are you and I different?
Nikita: you wear glasses & I dont.
Naina: you have dots on your face & I dont.

Mama: What is one thing you wish you could change about me?
Nikita: I wish you had longer hair.
Naina: I wish you will change your mind & give me some more Nutella....without bread.

I'd love to read…...

Butterfly

Karmickids

My space

Renu

Roshni Mitra Chintalapati

Sadiya

Suma

Umas &

Vinoo John's

............kids' answers to the questions.

My very first attempt at poetry…..

In my little world, they love me most,
Even when I’m at my very worst.

The kids, I tell you, they too much boast,
That mama makes a good chicken roast.

The ever-hungry kin insist I play host,
Dear friends, this weekend I’m going to be toast.

Yes its Nancy writing, no not her ghost,
Trying to wriggle out of writing a post.

©Nancy

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

P.s: Tune it to“Twinkle, twinkle little star”....the last line must be sung at super speed to get maximum effect.

p.p.s: Dont mind all the extra commas & fullstops…all cunningly employed to make poem look important.


p.p.s: For the curious, I will divulge how I wrote this...I took the word chicken roast, then lined up all words rhyming with it & voila'
p.p.p.s: Dear serious poem-writers, I beseech you to forgive my impudence. Umm....how do u guys make that c in a circle sign next to ur name????


Edited to add:
Thank U Doli & Preeti Shenoy for helping me out with the © sign.Blogging is so much fun...I learn new things everyday;-D!!!!!

After dinner.....

Characters: A middle-aged Malayalee couple

Time: Between 10-11pm

Place: Bangalore
**********************************************

Husband[settling himself in to sleep]: Have you let the dog out???

Wife[switching off the lights in the kitchen after final inspection]: I was just going to do that.

Husband: Don’t forget to keep the water bowl outside the verandah otherwise I’ll tripping over it when I open the door tomorrow.

Wife: Don’t worry, I’ll kept it near the plants.

Husband[adjusting the pillows to his satisfaction]: Did you lock the gate???

Wife: Yes I did that at around 8.30 itself when the boy from the shop brought the groceries.

Husband: Did you close all the windows????

Wife[a bit impatient now]: Ofcourse I did otherwise we would have been chewed up by the mosquitoes by now.

Husband: Hmmmmm.

Wife: The tap in the small bathroom is leaking, we have to do something about it.

Husband: Ah yes just keep a bucket underneath, will you.

Wife[sighs]: Ok I’ll go do that now.

Husband[settling deeper into the covers]: Did you lock the doors????

Wife[takes a deep breath]: No I didn’t.

Husband[senses undercurrents & backs off a bit]: So many robberies happening in the area, the world is not safe anymore.

Wife[attention diverted]: Yes Valsamma[church friend] was saying that the double storeyed house opposite the electricity board office was robbed in broad daylight 4 days back.

Husband: Did you lock the garage after the driver left????

Wife: Oh I completely forgot to……..[half-annoyed now] Why cant you do all this while I’m doing my work in the kitchen???

“You could do all these things quickly during the ad breaks” She adds pointedly.

Husband slides himself deeper into the folds of the coverlet.

Wife[gathering some clothes to fold]: In every house it is the man of the house who does all these things. Just yesterday Ponnamma[chatty neighbour] was telling me how Thomachan gets all the groceries home & she didn’t have to run to the shop for everything.

Husband[wisely]: That’s because Thomachan knows that Ponnamma will bring the whole shop home if he lets her shop.

Wife[not acknowledging husband’s effort to make her laugh, folding clothes in super speed]: Whereas here, you’ll just announce that we have people coming over for dinner & I have to run helter-skelter organizing everything….buy vegetables from the corner store, travel 1/2km by foot to buy chicken for the curry & beef for the cutlets, then go ¼ km in another direction to get the fruits. Get back home & spend the whole day slaving over the stove.
Finally after sending the guests back home, you'll very considerately tell me to leave everything where it is & do it in the morning. Huh…what kind of logic is that????

Husband[sticking his head out of the covers & bravely defending himself]: But I don’t tell you to make so many dishes. Just make plain rice & 1 or 2 curries, work is finished…what is the need to spend so much time in the kitchen????

Wife[looks outraged]: That’s it…invite people home & serve them rice and dal. Your logic is something I haven’t got used to even 20 yrs after marriage.
Do you know, I get up at 6 ‘0’ clock everyday & from then till now I haven’t rested even for a minute. By the time you get up at 9am I would have finished making breakfast, made separate food for the dog & even fed it, got the clothes washed & would be half-way thru making lunch but you have no sympathy for me.

Husband[knows the conversation does not show him in shining light, tries to tactfully end it]: Calm down, its 11 ‘0’ clock, do you want to wake up the neighbours….switch off the lights & lets get some sleep. You have to get up at 6 tomorrow.

Husband turns facing the wall & pretends to sleep.

Wife stands there furious, her eyes digging deep holes into the back of her husbands head.
____________________________________________________

Somewhere far away in the heart of Dubai…

After dinner…

Husband[watching tv] calls out: Have you fed the fish??????

Wife[sounding most apologetic]: Just feed them off please. I’m already in bed. Also, lock the front door before you come in to sleep, & oh don’t forget to get a glass of water for the kids just incase they get up in the middle of the night.

[The daughter of the middle-aged couple had more of her father in her than she ever thought]

HAPPY BELATED FATHER'S DAY PAPA!!!!!!!!!!!

Emotional Ecology

This TAG by Spontaneous Mini which wants me list out 10 things which emotionally tax me, has sapped me out totally…coz I thought & thought & thought for a looooong time before I wrote this much:

1. I detest people who spit on the walls & make them dirty.

2. I don’t spare anybody who dares to interrupt when the climax of a movie or the last over of a cricket match is going on.

3. I get very upset when I find out 2 people I introduced to each other have ganged up & are talking behind my back.

4. Parents or guardians who leave their children/wards loose in religious places, malls & parks to create mayhem are not being very responsible in my book.

5. I cringe when I’m forced to watch certain laughter gags on TV which cross the line of decency. There is a difference between playing a prank & ridiculing people in public.

6. Rigid People who see everything in BLACK or WHITE scare me. What about shades of grey, I ask??????

7. Tears come to my eyes every easily…..a rainbow, a tiny ladybird on a blade of grass, a premature baby, a breath-taking view, melodious music coaxed out of an instrument, an intricately carved figurine all make my eyes sting but I still stoutly maintain that its very hard to make me cry.

8. Sore losers put me off. It’s ok to cry in disappointment but don’t hold everybody & everything responsible for your loss.

9. Will somebody please tell a few people that it’s very rude to keep continuously talking while a wedding or a funeral is going on. Both these ceremonies are very sacred & important for the people concerned & families involved, so can they just hold off the idle chit-chat for sometime & give due respect.

10. I have a strong aversion to ‘devout’ Christians who waylay me on the streets & proceed to preach, what they think is, the right way to attain Salvation. After much trial & error, I had perfected my own way of getting back at them. I enthusiastically agree with all what they preach & interrupt them to add my 2 bits worth to everything. After a while they start looking a bit puzzled, then dazed & I get major CT’s watching them trying to wriggle out.
The last time I was in India, one of them was standing at the gate, I almost knocked my mother[who was politely telling the woman to go away] over in my eagerness to invite the lady in………. I spent a very happy hour refreshing old memories.


I tag…..

I scribble here

Lostworld

Pujathakur

Prabodh

Rakesh

Sara

Shalom

Thethoughtfultrain

Wanderlust

Mango Memories

I opened the refrigerator & reached for the mangoes. My hand fumbled around & finally found a small squashed one. I hesitated for a few seconds wondering if it was worth the trouble cutting just one for the kids. They were sure to make a huge fuss for more. Instead I could make some chicken mayo sandwiches for them & they didn’t have to know anything about the mango. Yes I’ll do that.

While I was toasting their sandwiches my eyes returned back to the lone mango sitting forlornly on the middle of the counter. It was the last of Pakistani mangoes which we had picked up last week. For those who haven’t had Pakistani Mangoes till today I must tell that they are so sweet that you must eat one to believe the saccharine flavor. After my throat infection & fever, food was tasting like sawdust but this cold, sunny looking mango was sitting there & making eyes at me.

I picked it up & scrutinized it for any unsightly spots. It was a bit squashed but didn’t look bad. It reminded me of my childhood holidays in Kerala where all of us cousins used to ceremoniously sit in front of a sackful of mangoes, pick the squishiest ones out, squash it some more by gently hitting it against the wall, then make a small opening on the top of the mango & suck the pulp out…….I involuntarily swallowed in remembrance.

I washed the mango, then gently beat the mango against the counter to smash the insides, made a slit on the top & put my mouth against the tiny cut & the sweet taste of childhood spilled into my mouth when….

Nikita[from behind]: What are you doing Mama??????

Mama[spins around guiltily, shielding the mango from view]: Nothing

There is no hiding from Nikita. She is like my conscience. Just last week I made cookies & then spent 20 minutes wondering where to ....ahem hide them. Nikita walked in after school, sniffed the air & announced “You made cookies!!!!!!” and proceeded straight to the place where I hid them & pulled the box out. I stood there wondering why I even bothered to hide them….nextime I’m just going to leave them on the counter, maybe then she’ll search the whole house & give up.

I show her the mango & half-heartedly ask her whether she’d like to eat the pulp like I was going to.

“Eeeewwwww” She shudders

I look enquiringly.

“Mama, it looks like its spoilt, throw it away” advises Nikita.

“No, its not…here, taste some, its yummy. I used to eat it like this when I was really small” I angle the mango towards her mouth.

“Didn’t you have knives to cut them with, in your childhood???” backing away, Nikita asks in pity, like as if we lived in pre-historic times.

“Don’t be silly, when I was little we loved to eat them like this....here just try some and see” I try to convince her.

Nikita does some quick thinking & says generously “Mama, you have it, we’ll eat the sandwiches.”

She hurries out of the kitchen with her plate of sandwiches just incase I change my mind & make her eat it.

I could hear her voice in the living room telling her sister “Naina, you know when Mama was small they didn’t have knives to cut the fruits with”.

I resisted the temptation to yell out that we did & stood there wondering whether to feel happy that I got the whole mango to myself or sad that my children don’t even want to know about the kind of fun I had when I was small, tearing the skin of the mango with our teeth, getting our hands all gooey with the sweet juice running down till the elbows, gnawing & extracting the last of the flesh till we saw the white of the hard seed, with the teeth tingling in remembrance long afterwards.


What is your favourite Mango Memory??????????

Plagiarizers I have a bone to pick with U......

Yesterday I came across this post where a blogger is accused of stealing a whole post from another blogger & pasting it as her own. There were some 90+ comments from a lot of people across the globe all indignant & ready to show their muscles. This intimidated the faker so much so that she[or was it a he] deleted the whole blog in remorse or was it humiliation.

And I felt so sad…….for myself. I’ve been blogging consistently almost 2 years now & have a lot of material which can be put to some good use. If you notice I don’t even have ‘creative copyright fundoo license whatever’ written anywhere in my blog. Anybody is free to plagiarize, borrow, steal anything they want from here but I have to face upto this reality glaring into my face……the honest truth that nobody wants to. Booohoohoo……..nobody wants to copy my stuff.

It seemed like an all too familiar scenario……I’m transported back to when I was in school, where once in a while I would learn up all the material for the exams & find the question-paper very easy to answer. While writing my paper I would keep a sharp eye out for anybody who wanted help. As expected, slowly heads which were bent over the question paper would rise & try to get the attention of the intelligent people in the class. I would attempt so hard to catch the eye of these people & smile at them with assurance…you know like winking & miming that they can ask me whatever they want. All I got in return was a raised eye-brow or a kind smile before they turned away to concentrate on the first-rankers. Huh!!!!!!

Good thing I had a thick-skin otherwise just imagine how much my father would have had to shell out in the name of counseling.

And you know this reminds me of another incident………..I used to go to college on a Hero Puch. Even my dear papa used to take the public transport but he got me a bike coz I used to be sick all over the fellow-passengers.
I took to the bike like a duck to water. I loved to stop at the local bus-stand & invite fellow college-mates so that I could save them a bumpy ride in the local transport. And I used to thoroughly enjoy the ride…you know its always great to have company….we sort of reached college faster. Soon I started noticing that as soon I was within sight of the bus stand, a few of them would rush into the middle of the crowd & try to make themselves invisible. The heights of it was when I saw my father trying to make himself as small as possible so that I wouldn’t notice him. Ofcourse I confronted him. He went all belligerent about not wanting his daughter taking control of his life & then when he saw I was hurt he said placating “Maybe if you focused more on the road in front of you……..”.

That familiar feeling of worthlessness is creeping up on me.

My posts……..what do they lack????? I’m so proud of them. Unlike yours, all the ideas are original…….each of them have been painstakingly written from scratch and elaborated on, each sentence is scrutinized atleast 5-6 times to see if it in sync with the rest of the matter, even the title of each post is decided upon only after much deliberation. I ask you……what is it which is lacking here????? Am I not worthy of atleast a teeny–weeny bit of it…does nobody want to copy-paste into their blogs my "Rat-a-tat” post or my “If you cut your nails on Tuesday, you’ll get money” post or the “I was stalked” post.

I’m sure it can't have escaped your notice that I too have got 41 followers, so many kind people have blog-rolled me & I get an average of 30-40 comments per post…….then why?????????

Mujh mein aisa kya kami hai, mere blogger saathiyoe???????*


*A dialogue usually voiced shrilly by the heroine in Hindi Cinemas & it roughly translates to "where am I found lacking, my blogger friends?????