Not very musically inclined

Music never featured BIG in my list of necessities anywhere. But that didnt mean I didnt like to listen to it; I do enjoy listening, singing along, breaking into a jig & it never fails to cheer me up but after an hour or so I also feel the need to switch it off & breathe in the silence.

During School & College days I did have good collection of English & Hindi cassettes & even took the trouble to write down the lyrics to memorise some of them[u knw, rewinding & rewinding to catch the lyrics]. Somehow I never bothered with songs of the 80's or 90's; I just loved to listen to songs from the 60's & 70's.

Nowadays I'm completely out of touch, except for odd songs like 'Masakali' or 'Jai Ho' or a 'Pehli Nazar' otherwise I'm completely indifferent to whats going on in the music world but yes I'm still very partial to the songs of the 60's & 70's.

Renu tagged me to list 10 favourite songs in any 2 languages; I'm putting up my 10 favourite Hindi & Malayalam songs. Listing English songs would probably been easier but I just felt like putting up a list of songs I like from Malayalam movies.

I actually put together my list of both favourite & then noticed that Renu had specified "SOULFUL, SLOW AND MELODIOUS SONGS"

Renu, please forgive me but I just cant think of going back & doing it all over again....this itself took me ages especially the Malayalam songs.

So here goes,

My 10 Favourite Hindi Songs:

1. Jab Koi Baat Bigad Jaaye - Jurm

[always brings back memories of my college days when all friends would sing it together]

2. Rhimjhim Gire Saawan - Manzil

[this is an altime favourite song]

3. Ajeeb Dastaan Hai - Dil apna aur preet paraya

[love to watch picturisation of the song; a soulful number sung by a woman to her love who's newly married to somebody else]

4. Chookar Mere Mann Ko - Yaaraana

[Just love the song....always gets my heart thudding expectantly;-P]

5. Ek Din Bik Jaayaega - Dharam something

[an old favourite......the only hindi song of which I know the lyrics & I sang on the stage in school]

6. Kahee Door Jab Din Dhal Jayae - Anand

[Soulful, beautiful, melancholy......makes me think about life & its mysteries, Rajesh Khanna actually looks good here]

7. Naina Barese, Rhimjhim Rhimjhim - Who Kaun Thi

[I just know 2 lines from this song & I keep singing it whenever I want to placate Naina;-D. Naina pretends to go all huffed up but loves the attention]

8. Zindagi Ek Safar - Andaz

[I'm running out of adjectives actually....partial to it coz it was a favourite when I was younger]

9. Raat Kali Ek Khwaab Mein Aaayi - Buddha Mil Gaya

[No reason...I just like it]

10. Pal, Pal Dil Ke Paas - Blackmail

[perfectly captures the essence of love atleast according to my idea of it;-P]

10 favourite Malayalam Songs:

1. Enthinu Veroru Sooryodayam - Mazhayethum Munpe

2. Aaayiram Kannumai - Nokkatha Doorathe Kannum Nattu

[An old classic........more my mom's favourite. Whenever it was aired my sister & I turned up the volume & waited expectantly.....within seconds mum would come running to watch it & we'd grin at eachother.]

3. Kaarmukil Varnente - Nandanam

[A poor servant girl's agony portrayed so well by Navya Nair that it brings tears to the eyes]

4. Olathumbathu Unzhaalaadi - Pappayude Swantham Appoos

[An old childhood favourite which reminds me of my native place Kerala]

5. Mele Vellithinkal - Tanmaatra

[Beautiful....oh so beautiful]

6. Kaattu Veliyude - Tanmaatra

[Ditto]

7. Parayaate Ariyaate - Udayananu Taaram

[yep u guessed right....bit of a Mohanlal fan]

8. Enthu Paranjaalum - Achchuvinte Amma

[picturises a mother's agony for an estranged daughter]

9. Kilukil Pamparam - Kilukkam

10. Manjakilliyude Moollee Paatunde - Kanmadam

[brings a smile to the face....I bet the old lady without teeth still cant believe her luck tht she got to dance with Mohanlal]

10.1. Ende Ammae Onnu Kaannaan - Nammal

[I just had to include this one. Its a song from a child[adult] to his mother yearning to see her........I cry whenever I watch or hear it...always:-(]

I tag

Blindwreck

Deeps

I scribble here

Iya

My space

Ordinary Guy

SandyaS

Shalom

Shayari

Sindhu

Snow

Solilo

Sriparna

WannabeWriter

Now that I've finished with it I can get all nostalgic & say that I enjoyed doing the tag & am especially feeling very pleased about taking the trouble to pick out the Malayalam songs. My memory being what it is, I'm sure that I'd love to read all this back 10-20yrs later.

Dear God,

My earliest memories are of my mother, sister & I sitting on a yellow straw mat & praying to You. Mother taught me beautiful hymns, she taught me verses from the bible & I remember coming 1st in Sunday school. She also taught me how to pray.

I knew the Bible quite well....ofcourse I dont claim to have understood it but I could recite many short chapters from the Psalms & knew most of the stories in the Bible. I once read the whole Bible in 1 week[yeah I know You know that I was terribly sick with typhoid & didnt have another book to read]. I knew who Ruth was, what Esther did, who Elijah & Elisha were & how they went to heaven, knew about David & Goliath, Wise King Solomon & most importantly I thought I knew all about your Son & how he gave his life up for us.

All good uptil here huh!!!!

But as You very well know, somewhere along the line I lost interest...not that I didnt believe in you. I did but I never took time out to talk with you. I never thanked you for my blessings, I didnt approach you when I had decisions to make. Even when I had troubles it never occurred to me to come to you and even it did occur I could never do it because my reasoning was that I never did it when I was feeling good so I had no right to approach You when I was feeling miserable.

I dont really recall when or why I started distancing myself from You. I sort of started relegated You to the backgroud during my teenage years. Oh I still sat with my family for the family prayer where we sang hymns[I thought I sang pretty good], read the bible[yeah I liked hearing the sound of my voice], sing songs again. Here I got irritated...well we already sang songs, right???...whats the need to sing again???
Chitrahaar was going to start in exactly 20 mins & this hymn was going to take up 4-5 precious minutes & then the final prayer would take another 10-15 mins. Throughout the prayer I would stealthily peek thru my closed eyelids at the clock & my brain would try to connect with my mom's brains to "Keep it short, keep it short, KEEP IT SHORT, please". Ofcourse Ma would decide to say 2 extra prayers that night. Finally the Amen & the sign of the cross happened in fast forward mode & the next second found me in the living room pressing the red button on the TV remote.
Oh dang...the first break was already in. I bet Ma deliberately does this, I would think bitterly.

Looking back, teenage years were trying times. I sure could have done with some Faith. Whether we joined her in Prayer or not I knew my mother shed tears while she prayed for us. I watched my sister....my younger sister read the Bible & Pray every night before going to sleep while I slept or pretended to.

But I know You haven't forgotten those odd occasions when I did come to You & laid my heart bare at your feet. Every once in a while I reminded you about this wish I had……..for a good husband. Not those rich or pretty-looking dudes, just a good human being who'd stand by me through thick & thin & oh how can I forget that I asked for good wedding photographs. Coz wedding photgraphs were for life & however I turned out later, these pictures would be my signature for life....something to show my kids & grandkids. Ofcourse I realise now that it was 1 dumb request as the kids recognise everybody else in those photographs except me. You must have had a good laugh while granting that request.

You granted both those requests……a fine man by my side & good wedding photographs. My faith was strengthened by the good things which were happening & I thanked You over & over again.
Leaving my family to be with a man I was hardly knew was a big test in my faith in You. I still remember sitting in that plane 10 yrs back to join the man I married, staring blankly through the window into the darkness outside with tears pouring down my cheeks. Just for a moment I even wondered whether I’d reach my destination.

I wonder if You realized that at first when I started praying genuinely I felt like such a fake…like I was mouthing some lines simply because I thought you expected to hear it. Prayer didn’t come easily…and placing my complete faith in You was so difficult. If I gave myself to You COMPLETELY, did that mean I have to give up movies or games or erase that bit of deviousness which was present inside me??? I was not really ready.

The children made their appearance & their growth again made me marvel at Your Kindness. Along with the children I also grew…..wider. But jokes apart……except for the quick one-liners muttered under my breath, there were times I was busy or too tired by the end of the day to speak with You, and strangely my faith was deeper than ever.
Obstacles would appear from nowhere, the people I depended on most may not have been there to shield me and You my Lord also took your own sweet time to respond but there wasn’t any doubt that You’d make it right finally & that if I held on to You I’d be totally safe.

Maybe I’m feeling my age…………..maybe I have more faith than before or maybe its Just You……I’ve gradually started depending on You, learning to let go and lean on Your strength, though I still have my doubts about my Faith whether….
… I’m good enough in your eyes
…or maybe I’m doing it all wrong
...You’ll reject me when I reach there

Then again I realize all these misgivings are about me…….about You there is never really any doubt.

Yours till eternity,
Nancy

A Hundred Questions

Was tagged by Shayari on this...........

100 things about me


ABOUT U:

1. What's your name→ Nancy

2. Nicknames→ Nance, Nancy Drew..... and no, not Nan.

4. Zodiac sign → Aquarius

5. Male or female or transgendered → Female

6. Elementary→ Heeeee.....Holy Cross School, Bangalore

7. Schools → St. Charles High School, Bangalore

8. Colleges → Bishop Cottons Women’s Christian College, Bangalore

9. Height → 5'4”[almost]

10. Hair color → Black

11. Long or short → Mid length

12. Do you have a crush on someone? → No but I sure would like to crush a few people

13: Ever been in love? Ask me when I've been out of love, first my parents & sister and now with my husband & kids

14. Piercings → of the ears.

15. Tattoos → Never wanted one but like to see them on others

16. Righty or lefty → A little bit of both

FIRSTS :

17. First piercing → Ears, When I was 5.

18. First best friends →Farhana & Tanveer

19. First sport you joined→ Some kind of drill I think for School sports day.

20. First pet → Toothie, a German Shepherd.

21. First vacation → Kerala, my birthplace

22. First concert → In School I think, don’t remember really.

23. First crush → Sometime in 7th std, few days later I found out that he studied in 6th std & the crush died an instant death.

24. Eating → When hungry……. is the correct answer. But alas…its whenever I see food I like.

25. Drinking → Only when I’m parched:-S. I'm trying to change.

26. I'm about to → get the kids cleaned up for dinner.

27. Listening to → Jai Ho[& the kids are doing a war style dance in the background]


LASTS:

28. Last beverage → Chocolate Milk

29. Last phone call → 12 hrs back

30. Last text message → from Etisalat trying to convince to me join some scheme where I could call India for 99fils.

31. Last song you listened to → Previous to Jai Ho was Pehli Nazar from Race

32. Last time you cried → a week back........thanking God.


HAVE YOU EVER:

33. Dated someone twice → I’ve never dated:-). No, not even once.

34. Been cheated on? → Yeah that’s happened with friends

35. Kissed someone & regretted it? → Yeah when the kids don’t clean up after eating chocolates & I'm just going out .

36. Lost someone special? → Yeah once in a while I mourn for my innocence

37. Been depressed?→ Oh Yes, I don’t really need reasons to get depressed

38. Been drunk and threw up? → Nope…..haven’t really drank anything alcoholic as such unless you count breezers or wine.


HAVE YOU:

39. Made new friends → Not recently…..I’m friendly but take a lot of time to make good frinds

40. Fallen out of love → More like, fallen out of infactuations.

41. Laughed until you cried → So many times….last was the Fatty Bombalatty incident:-D

42. Met someone who changed you → No….I keep mourning that also.

43. Found out who your true friends were → No I still get surprised by some actions of good friends

44. Found out someone was talking about you → Oh I find that out automatically, my ears tingle & turn red everytime people talk abt me.

45. Kissed anyone on your friend's list → On the cheek, yes

46. Made the first Move → Never....basically lacked the courage.

47. Do you have any pets → We have 4 fish…Rosie, Goldie, Longie & Greedy

48. Do you want to change your name → Not anymore

49. What did you do for your last birthday → Had my friend & her kids over for the whole day, cut a cake; basically had a surprisingly good day.

50. What time did you wake up today – 07:45 AM…..would have slept longer but the maid arrives at 8.

51. What were you doing at midnight last night→ just got back home after church & from shopping[Friday is weekend here like how Sunday is for the rest of the world]

52. Name something you CANNOT wait for → some peace & quiet in my life. I have 2 children who cannot comprehend the beauty of silence.

53. Last time you saw your father → April 2008

54. What is the one thing you wish you could change about your life → When I make a decision, I want to make it happen.

55. Most visited webpage → No surprises here, My Blog:)

56.Bribed someone? → Yes, a policeman, for something to do with my passport.

57.Played with dolphins? → Not yet, plan to do it soon


YOUR FUTURE :

58. Want kids? → No already have 2, but at odd moments I think I wouldn't mind a third one. Luckily sanity prevails in 5 minutes

59. Want to get married ? → Maybe on the 60th year to renew the vows…will be fun I think.

60. Careers in mind? → Oh yes so many…..but as of now a dedicated homemaker

61. Settling in a Big Villa? → Maybe One day

62. Day or night? → Day

63. What day is tomorrow? → Sunday.

64. Challenges? → I'm not that daring to go types....more laidback. But if I have company I'm more enthusiastic.

65. Drive with windows up or down? → down anyday

66. Scared of Death? → Yes, a bit.

67. Cook or Clean? → Dont really fancy both but I guess clean if somebody will make the stuff I like to eat.

68. Lips or eyes → Lips or eyes, what?????

69. Hugs or kisses → Not very comfortable with both except with the family .

70. Shorter or taller → Taller

71. Older or Younger → A li'l older.

72. Romantic or spontaneous → Spontaneous.

73. Nice stomach or nice arms → This is like asking “devil or the deep sea.???”

74. Sensitive or loud → I think the question should have read sensitive or thick skinned, I mean loud is the opposite of quiet, right???? Anyways I'll stop trying to divert u......a mixture of both, I'd like to think:-P.

75. Hook-up or relationship → Don't gimme ideas:-P

77. Trouble maker or hesitant → Troublemaker Heeeeee.


HAVE YOU EVER :

78. Kissed a stranger → I don’t think

79. Lost glasses/contacts → No…..I’ve sat on them, broken them but never lost them, touchwood.

80. Found money on the road → Yes, rs.5/- when I was in 5th std.

81. Sex on first date → U r joking

82. Broken someone's heart → I never got a chance

83. Had your own heart broken → Same as above

84. Held a snake? → No, & no way.

85. Been arrested → No.....boring life I tell U

86. Turned someone down → Yes

87. Cried when someone died → Oh I just have to hear the news & my eyes fill esp if the person is young.

88. Liked a friend that is a girl/boy? → Yes


DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

89. Yourself → U r joking again

90. Miracles → I believe….& am waiting patiently for that free trip around the world to materialise.

91. Love at first sight → Nope, didnt happen even when I saw my children for the 1st time.

92. Heaven → lots of clouds floating, I wear white robes & float around with the angels singing[soprano] glorious hymns & playing golden musical instruments. Sounds idyllic huh!!!!!

93. Santa Clause → I believe in the symbolism

94. Peace in this lifetime → Too much to expect I think

95. Kissing on the first date? → This is like asking if I’ll give away my kid for adoption. Incase u r still in doubt, maybe............heeee just kidding much as it is tempting.

96. Angels → Oh yes, lot of them floating around with big black diaries keeping track of our deeds……….

97. Is there one person you want to be with right now? → Two....My parents

98. Had more than one boyfriend/girlfriend at one time in the past? → Huh!!!!!

99. You will die Young → Yeah You will, not me

100. You will end with the one you love and learn to love the one you are with – The latter


And I tag.......

Anusha

Deeps

Durga

Former sansmerci

Indyeah

Mindspace

Naperville mom

Prashanti

Rohini

Sindhu

Sunshine

Smi

Umas

Winnie

Though there are 100 questions to be answered it didnt take very long……the numberings were a big mess when I got it, so I straightened it out. Have fun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Feat of Clay

The tooth fairy visited Nikita 2 weeks back & left 10dhs under her pillow[the tooth fairy got fed up of leaving gifts coz teeth kept falling with unfailing regularity].

Contrary to our expectations, Nikita was thrilled to receive money instead of a gift & we were hitting ourselves for spending so much money on gifts the last 2 yrs when we could have gotten away with keeping dhs.10 under the pillow.

Now Nikita walked around with that amount the whole of the next week wondering what to buy. Finally she decided on a packet of coloured clay. Much against my better judgment I let her pick it up. A year back the sisters made so much mess with some clay they had that I decided never to get it for them again until they were old enough to clean up after themselves.

There was a lot of improvement this year…they actually made models of things & I was quite impressed with their creative outbursts.

I’m going to relate to you something which took place & do want to know what you think.


A week back Nikita[7½ yrs] & Naina[5yrs] came to me with their hands behind their back…

Nikita: Mama we’ll show you something & you have to tell us which one you like best.

Mama[without agreeing to their conditions]: Show me the things first.

Naina: Taaaantaaaadan……

Naina[excitedly]: Ok which one do u like best?????

Nikita[confidently]: You’ve got to choose whichever model is the best.

I’m in a quandary here. I know which one looks better[both are supposed to be birds by the way]…..but how can I rate one above the other & disappoint the owner of the not-so best one??? Once in a while they put me in a situation like this & usually I wriggle out with a standard answer.

Mama: Ohhhhh they are sooooo beautiful, I like both of them.

Nikita[disappointed]: Noooooo….you’ve got to choose one.

Mama: Well I can’t help it if I like both, can I????

Both of them murmuring disappointedly went away after I clicked pictures of their exhibits.

Half an hour later….

They come back with their hands behind their backs again.

Nikita: Mama, we’ve made new things & this time please don’t say you like both.

Nikita & Naina[together]: Okkkkkkkk please, please, please????

Mama[sighes in exasperation]: Alright show it to me.

Taaaantadaaaaan…..

Since I have no creative abilities to speak of I'm always impressed when I see the kids doing even the simplest of things. Now Nikita’s Crab looks good to my eyes but when I look up I see Naina’s face which has a defeated look…like she knows her sister’s model looks better & her distress was clear at her inability to make a nice exhibit[her’s was supposed to be a dragon, by the way].

Nikita: You HAVE to tell us which is the best, please, please, please you have to.

Naina: Yes Mama you have to.

Mama who had no idea how to tackle the situation took the easy way out

“I don’t like both”!!!!!

“MAMA” wail both in unison.

Nikita: Naina I know why mama is doing this. Mama doesn’t want to choose one & make the loser feel bad, so she is simply saying that she doesn’t like both.

I shake my head in amused irritation that she read me so well.

Nikita: Mama we are going to make something else & this time please don’t say you like both or that you don’t like both. You have to choose one as the best.

Naina[in renewed enthusiasm]: Yes you have to choose.

They go away & Nikita comes back after 2 minutes without Naina’s knowledge & advises me.
“Mama, I know why you can doing this, you don’t want to hurt one of us right by choosing the better thing. Why don’t you do 1 thing…….just judge the clay models by giving a 1st prize & a 2nd prize, that way we both win prizes & won’t feel bad at all”.

She then rushess away to make her model & I stare after her in wonder. Now why didn’t I think of that????

In the end that’s what I did…..declared 1st & 2nd prizes.

And the below were made a few days back….just couldn’t help putting them up.....you know, to show it off. In case you are wondering if Naina’s exhibit is a bomb, yes it is………you know the one’s which Tom & Jerry use to blow eachother up, yeah its modeled on that.

Now I’m curious…..how do all of You deal with this kind of situation??? And those who don’t have kids, do you remember how your parents dealt with this kind of situation??? And those who don’t have kids or dont remember how your parents dealed with this, how do You think this kind of situation should be dealt with?????

And finally for those who are not interested in answering the above question, let me ask you another question.....can you take a guess what Naina had made in the 3rd picture[next to Nikita's sofa & flower]?????
I ask coz I couldn't figure it out when she first showed them to me but had a hearty laugh when I found out.

Edited to add: Its drumsticks People............. she made Chicken legs. Naina is fond of fried chicken legs..........so I guess it was instinctive of her to have made it so close to dinnertime. Rows of the same thing confused me too at first.........anyways I had so much fun reading all the imaginative comments.............heeeeee:-D. A big hand to umas, everybody!!!!!! She added the word Chicken to everybody else's lollipop:-D!!!!!!

Why do I Blog??????

The topic “Why do I Blog” keeps raising its ragged head again & again. Everytime I read a blogger’s take on this topic I keep thinking about putting up a post on it but it never happened….mainly because I didn’t have enough reasons to put forward in front of you without sounding like…….. like dumb for starters.

Like always let me start at the beginning; sometime in 2005 I registered in rediff specifically to blog….. I must have put up a total of 5 or 6 posts in a span of 6 months, so sporadic & half hearted was the effort that one fine day I realized that I had forgotten the password….yeah just like that. So that was that.

Cut to 2 years later….. the Interior Decoration Company I was working for, had hardly any work at 1 particular point in time & to top it we finally got the broadband connection which was awaited with great excitement. First, games for kids were duly downloaded & loaded at home, then new recipes were tried & tested in the kitchen….then what….oh yes I managed to pick up Excel from the Microsoft site[very easy with complete tips & tricks if anybody is interested]……if I were smarter I would have proceeded on that same track, you know, updating myself with more softwares & information…..but that’s simply not me....I have never haboured any hopes or plans to improve, not then and definitely not now.

Maintaining an online diary appealed to me……..you know, in school & college I used to have a diary where I recorded my thoughts & intentions on a weekly basis….which gradually became monthly & then after my marriage it declined some more & became on a yearly basis…..now nonexistent ofcourse.

I blogged in MSN Windows live for a few months and then for some reason the link to my blog stopped working. I could login but nobody else could view my page. Then a friend suggested blogger which was supposedly more popular with more options & more windows friendly to geeks like me. Painstakingly using the copy & paste option I moved all my posts to blogger. Blogger in the beginning wasn’t at all user friendly & didn’t have so many options which I took for granted in Msn but even inbetween all that the cussing I was halfheartedly updating. I gave my link to friends & family. Nobody bothered to comment except for Bins…..and even she did it mostly out of fear coz she knew I could track her visits thru feedjit.

Then ofcourse I stumbled upon Ps site like any other blogger. After much delibration I tentatively commented on one of her posts. And she so sweetly returned the favour.

Which is when the fact that all my people came in to read what I wrote but didn’t bother to comment finally got my goat. I got mad & locked everybody out except Bins. Then after a few weeks I commented once again at Ps’s blog asking her permission to blogroll her. And Ps wrote back asking me why I blocked my page.

Imagine my excitement………somebody actually wanted to read what I wrote. I double rushed to throw open the gates to my blog once again. Around the same time another blogger
Preethi who came to my blog all on her own & generously commented on most of my posts. And I also returned the favour enthusiastically….though I must say unlike Ps’s posts where I had to break my brains to comment intelligently Preethi posts were easy to comment on.

Out of curiosity I checked for bloggers in Dubai…u know just to see if there were other people trying to kill time like me. After browsing some 400 profiles I come across ISH . I was not planning on commenting but the last sentence in her post just made me want to & I did. Then she commented on mine. The rest as they say is History. After that come rain or shine we have faithfully commented on eachothers post….nothing complicated here but pure loyalty I assure you. Even today she may not update for 2-3 weeks but if I don’t update atleast once a week she will come over & command “Update Woman!!!!”. What audacity I tell you!!!!

Likewise I have no hesitation commenting something, anything in Bins, Renu, Shalom, Winnie, Wannabe.... and Lan's blog even if they didn’t on mine coz our association goes way back. Thankfully with the exception of Winnie, all the rest write about matters I can associate with, so that makes things easier.
Winnie, I like her stories…….now if only she made the effort to complete them. Shhhhhh please don’t tell her I said this….I can’t afford to antagonize her as most of my awards come from her backyard.

And while I’m at it how can I avoid mentioning Agnes, Anjuli, Goofy Mumma, Maddy, Piper .., SMRITI, Sunshine, because irrespective of whether I commented on their page or not they never fail to leave a comment on all my posts.

Nowadays I find myself hard pressed for time but even then when I come across posts which makes me laugh or touches me I make an effort to comment coz I haven’t forgotten my initial struggle in the blogging world[duhhh why do I get the feeling I'm making a “I’m a person who studied hard under the streetlamp & became a doctor” kinda speech].

Very recently I came across a blog which writes exactly the way I think but never been able to put it on paper with the ease she does. Infact her post on this same topic is what actually got me to write this post finally. And here is another blog …..the sense of humour I instantly connected with. And no....I didnt put her down here because she wrote about me last week. I was the one who commented first on her blog 2-3 weeks back. So there!!!!
ummm......coming back to what I was saying......similarly there are so many others out there who match your mindset & are just waiting to be read. How exciting really!!!!!

At the risk of being labeled a fake I have to tell u that I don’t write or in this case blog for myself. I don’t consider myself a blogger per se, more like a story teller. So just imagine a story teller without an audience…likewise me. I’m sure I’d have stopped blogging loooong back without your encouraging comments.

Yes like Lan mentioned once when we get a certain number of people following what we have to say, there is a bit of expectation associated with it. But since I don’t write about Global Warming or How to eradicate Poverty in the 3rd world countries, I get away with the gross misappropriation of facts & figures.
Again the important thing here is that it is precisely because of that expectation that I make an honest attempt to deliver.

And ofcourse not the least, I cant totally deny the fact that I like penning down my thoughts & random incidents in my life which tickle my funnybone, posting it hoping you find it as funny or moving as I do. And while I'm at it, let me without an iota of shame assure you that I absolutely love receiving comments & will happily proceed to further discuss the matter with you in the comments section.

Now if only I had encouragement like this to lose some weight :-(

Happy Women's Day Everybody!!!!!!

In the Hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where their family member lay gravely ill.

Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber.

"I'm afraid I am the bearer of bad news," he said as he surveyed the worried faces, "The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant. It's an experimental procedure, semi-risky, and you will have to pay for the brain yourselves."

The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news.

After a length of time, someone asked, "Well, how much does a brain cost?"

The Doctor quickly responded, "$5000 for a male brain, and $200 for a female brain."

The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to smile, avoiding eye contact with the women, but some actually smirked.

A man, unable to control his curiosity, blurted out the question everyone wanted to ask, "Why is the male brain so much more?"

The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and then to the entire group said, "It's just standard pricing procedure. We have to mark down the price of the female brains, because they've been used."


Happy Women's Day Everybody!!!!!!!!!

Even the best of Friends must part

I was feeling dizzy & nauseous in class[8th std] one day; the teacher asked for a volunteer to accompany me outside & when Neetu was the only one who put her hand up, I was pathetically gratified.
The next day I had forgotten to bring my lunchbox & Neetu who went home for lunch came back with 4 slices of Masala Bread from Iyengar’s bakery. I decided then & there that I’ll be her friend for life.

Her house was very close to our school. Very soon we were spending all our time in & out of school together. She was the only child to her parents & luckily for us her parents took a liking to me.
I say luckily because there were quite a few instances we got mad at eachother & it was her parents who solved our issues & got us back together.

We were not at all alike Neetu & I……infact when I look back now I cannot imagine how we ever became friends & spent more than 13+ yrs in eachother’s company.

We both loved books; but she preferred gritty hard hitting novels like Jeffrey Archer & Sidney Sheldon whereas I leaned towards the mushier stuff like Danielle Steele & Mills & Boon.
We loved music; she preferred English head banging stuff & was crazy about George Michael & other boy bands; I enjoyed 60’s & 70’s Hindi music.

The only things we unanimously agreed upon was…… our mutual dislike for kids. Our favourite timepass at Christmas & other get togethers was to make grotesque faces at kids, scaring them away & grinning conspiratedly at eachother.

So many memories…..

*She always dragged me along when she was buying clothes. It just happened that whenever we went together she always got exactly what she was looking for.
*We’d order something at a restaurant & my meal always looked & tasted better than hers. She used to be so peeved & cunningly talk me into exchanging plates.
*She had 4 dogs……one of them was named after her cousin Johnnie & cousin Johnnie had a dog named Neetu. U can very well imagine what transpired whenever they met.
Both my dogs Toothie & Cookie were gifted to me by her parents.
*Can never forget our trips to the Mecca library at Commercial street & Cox town where we whiled away a lot of time.
*She was the one who enlightened me that babies can also come out from the passage below[till then I was under the impression that the only option was to cut open the stomach to take the baby out]
*Death by Chocolate at Corner House, Residency Rd was our favourite dessert. It cost a whopping Rs.35 that time. On special occasions, we’d both order 1 each. She would eat hers quickly & then impatiently wait coz she knew I’ll stop halfway & give the remaining to her….infact most of the treats ended the same way.
*She loved the cocoa cakes & appams my mom made.
*If you pulled up the mattress on her bed, you’ll find tiny paper packets of chilli powder & salt underneath……..she always ate it while reading a book.
*On one of her birthdays I gave her a gift wrapped package. She opened the wrapper to find a cardboard box which had Prestige Pressure Cooker written on it. She tried hard to hide her disgust & then was so thrilled when she saw a pair of sports shoes inside.

Around 6 years after we became friends we were nostalgically discussing how highly unlikely our friendship was, if not for that single act of kindness at the beginning & I find out that she volunteered to accompany me out coz she was bored & was looking for a way to get out of class.
Though I threw something at her at that time, I grinned understandingly as the explanation made complete sense.

In college we were in different classes & made other friends but always found time to spend with eachother.

Her mother is a well known gynecologist who had a hectic schedule. To get away from all that stress, every year they went on a 1-2 weeks holiday to some vacation spot. I was always included since Neetu would refuse to go without me. Thanks to them I’ve been to many places in South India like Madras, Kodaikanal, Ooty, Goa and stayed in the best places. Sometimes Aunty would generously tell me to bring my sister along too but Neetu was not too enthusiastic about the idea coz it meant that she had to share me with my sister.

Even today when I see Hersheys chocolates & those huge Danish biscuit tins I think of Neetu. She had several aunts & uncles abroad who would send her delicious chocolates & biscuits. Like a typical only child who didn’t know how to share, she would open the box & pick out the thinnest ones to give me. As an afterthought however she would promise to get me 1 whole tin when she went abroad & got a job.

I loved her……..quirks and all. She was older to me agewise but I was incharge[atleast I thought so]. After college she went away to Chennai to study a complex course in Computer Science but we kept in touch with letters. When she came back after a year, we got together & it was ‘almost’ like before.
I worked somewhere close to her house, so was able to drop in to chat & catch up every opportunity I got.
Her parents were looking for a groom for her long before mine started to but somehow her marriage never happened.

Then I got married & left to Dubai. We wrote mails to each other every once in a while & spoke on birthdays & special occasions but after sometime we sort of stopped communicating.

But every year when I go on vacation I visit her without fail. We are happy to see eachother & catch up on the latest with each other but somewhere something’s missing. We are no longer able to just carry on where we left off. Conversation dries up within 20-30 mins after meeting. Then its just about the weather & other general stuff. My kids don’t interest her at all…..I smile resignedly….she still hasn’t changed in that respect.

I felt like the smallest thing on earth, when once in a moment of weakness she told me how hounded & pressurized she & her parents felt because of her unmarried status and that she deliberately looked for a job outside the country so that she could escape from it all.
So when she asks me the standard question “So how’s married life???”, I act quite bored, pretend the grass is greener on her side & that she’s lucky to have escaped the noose.

I see the sadness in her parents’ eyes when they see me with my kids. I feel guilty somewhere inside me for leading a normal life in contrast to their daughter. Just for a moment I feel like as if I’ve deserted their daughter after being by her side for more than a decade.

She is somewhere in Singapore now & our vacations to India don’t happen at the same time so I haven’t seen her in recent years. But there are so many things which remind me of her almost everyday….
...My firstborn is named Nikita because Neetu & I loved the name.
...My wedding anniversary falls on her birthday
...Archie Comics & Mad Magazines always remind me of her.
...'Sacrifice', 'Final Coundown', 'Careless whispers' & 'Last Christmas' teleport me straight into her messy room.
...When I bake a cocoa cake I wish there was a way I could send some of it to her.

I've written quite a few mails asking her how she’s been, reminiscing our days together but haven’t received a single reply back. Once upon a time I could have given you a detailed account of how exactly her mind worked.

My mother tells me that they have shifted their residence to another part of town & for the 1st time I realize I don’t have another contact number other than their old house phone number[I lost my cell phone & in the process lost her contact number].

I know she’s decided to cut loose…….decided that old memories & connections don’t serve any purpose except to remind her of the void in her life.

It hurts that she doesn’t want anything to do with me, that she finds it so easy to just dismiss the times we spent together. Worst of all it haunts me that I never tried hard enough to keep in touch with her.

But even today if I have to talk about her it's always "My best friend Neetu used to........".

I guess, old habits die hard.