Thursday, 21 August 2008

Fart a Joke!!!!

This piece was written by a newly married lady...........

One day I met a sweet gentleman and fell in love. When it became apparent that we would marry, I made the supreme sacrifice and gave up eating beans.
Some months later, on my birthday, my car broke down on the way home from work. Since I lived in the countryside I called my husband and told him that I would be late because I had to walk home.

On my way, I passed by a small diner and the odour of baked beans was more than I could stand. With miles to walk, I figured that I would walk off any ill effects by the time I reached home, so I stopped at the dinner and before I knew it, I had consumed three large orders of baked beans.
All the way home, I made sure that I released all the gas.

Upon my arrival, my husband seemed excited to see me and exclaimed delightedly: 'Darling I have a surprise for dinner tonight.' He then blindfolded me and led me to my chair at the dinner table. I took a seat and just as he was about to remove my blindfold, the telephone rang.
He made me promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned and went to answer the call.

The baked beans I had consumed were still affecting me and the pressure was becoming most unbearable, so while my husband was out of the room I seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to one leg and let one go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of a pulpwood mill. I took my napkin from my lap and fanned the air around me vigorously. Then, shifting to the other cheek, I ripped off three more. The stink was worse than stinking cabbage. Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the conversation in the other room, I went on like this for another few minutes. The pleasure was indescribable.
When eventually the telephone farewells signaled the end of my freedom, I quickly fanned the air a few more times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and folded my hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased with myself.

My face must have been the picture of innocence when my husband returned, apologizing for taking so long. He asked me if I had peeked through the blindfold, and I assured him I had not.

At this point, he removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests seated around the table chorused:
'Happy Birthday!'!!

I nearly died!!!

** Received this joke in my mail & I found it soooo funnnny. I never ever guessed how it would end. And everytime I thought of the joke I couldn't help smiling. And I was also curious....
As to what u guys think of the joke..........funny....gross......dumb.....or.....????


  1. Ha ha...grossly funny if theres such a word..I`d be mortified!!

  2. Its the funniest thing I`ve ever read!!!! :) Had a hearty laugh! :) First time here,btw. And definitely plan to continue visiting, if all your posts are this funny! :)

  3. cant stop smiling:) and I cudnt guess the end :)

  4. hey, i got this in my mail a week back and forwarded it to every person.. it was hilarious! bcus even i kept wondering till the end of the joke.. not a huge fan of fart jokes, this one was so funny though :P

  5. ROTFLOL!!!!!

    That is suuuuppppremely embarrassing!!!!!!

  6. I think I posted a comment yesterday:)

  7. I was laughing sooo hard when I got to the end!!

  8. Laughed all over again after reading all ur answers. I cd just imagine all ur reactions:-D

    I related this joke to somebody else & they told me that there was no way this story cd be true coz a woman would never put herself down this publicly.
    I was like "Maybe, but I had a good laugh";-P

  9. I read this very recently and yes first found it funny...but later gross! And not to mention, I would never like to be in that lady's shoes..

  10. U know what? I've heard this before but in another version - the characters were different, but the same hilariously embarrassing situation :D :D

  11. ha ha ha...really funny.....i think i had read it before...but u just cant stop laughing can u?

  12. :) thanks for going through my blog!Yes, the pictures were taken by us. Infact you can see me and my in-laws in 2 of them :) if you look long and hard!Try clicking on the pictures for a larger view. The place actually looks this perfect.Unbelievable,isnt it?
    Secondly, yes, I was in the army. But trust me, nothing glamorous about it, as people usually think :) you havent missed much by not joining! Trust me! :) And lastly, thanks for the generous comments you left. And keep visiting! :)

  13. I kind of understood where it was leading to.. but still so funny!

  14. Hi nancy! How r u ? Are u very busy now a days?

  15. bins: oooh the stink & the shame:-D

    shalom: I bet that joke was not as funny as this one;-P

    ssk: Heeehee, even now I smile when I type this.

    am: really?? I never ever guessed where it was leading;-o. Not surprising since it takes me 5 minutes to assimilate even normal jokes:-S. But I had a GOOD laugh:-D

  16. piper: seriously the 1st picture was a fairy-tale.

    renu: Yes terribly:-(. But inspite of it I managed a post today;-P

  17. Oh my god!!!! how embarassing!! the fool of a husband!! he heee funny :D

  18. I started laughing right from "...I made the supreme sacrifice and gave up eating beans." Fantastic!

  19. Hilarious. I did not see it coming!

  20. preethi: Hehe...I LMAO but secretly I also cringe in embarrasment for her when she opens her eyes & c's 12 people sitting around.

    Shades: the title itself gives away the nature of the joke, so we are prepared but never did I imagine the ending;-D

    Agnes: All thru the joke I was wondering where it was leading & like u, never saw it coming;-D


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