Thursday 27 September 2012

Tried and Tested on Kids


A friend of mine got married in his late thirties and they had a baby recently. He is a big guy in the creative field, very confident but fatherhood has completely freaked him out. He takes a very healthy interest in his baby and even the minutest details are given a lot of attention. 

Once in a while we meet online, after the barest pleasantries he is onto his favourite subject…his baby. I try to calm him down with all the stuff I remember about when my kids were little. One day he thanked me profusely for all the help and asked me why despite being a mother there wasn’t a single post on bringing up children on the blog.

I laughed & dismissed the idea of a post outright but after grandly announcing my return to blogging a week back and then looking around blankly for a while[for inspiration;-P] I didn’t have much choice.

Anyways here is some gyaan for what it’s worth….

#Babies generally cry for 3 reasons; hunger, lack of sleep or a wet nappy. Only after you’ve ticked off these 3 things, should you proceed forward to exploring your other[often unfounded] fears.

Another reason could be gas. That’s why burps are like sweet music to the parents’ ears. Timely burps also saves you from needing to change your outfit after every feed which your baby dutifully throws up on you.
How to do it: Hold baby upright and pat the back gently for a while. You know what they say about watched kettles right……don’t expect the burb right away; give it 20 mins, if you are lucky it will happen in 10. The little ones who burp immediately & to the point[minus the mess I mean] have very, very lucky parents.

#Using cotton nappys is a very noble thought but if you want a good night’s sleep use a good[brand] diaper only for the nights. Just wash the itty-bitty bummy with water & mild soap everytime you change the diaper & apply a bit of Vaseline. A good night’s sleep for everybody involved assured.

#Don’t knock Pacifiers without trying them. If you have a baby with Mariah Carey’s musical pitch[the kind that can shatter glass] or the depth of an ambulance siren[goes on and on] pacifiers are life-savers. This tip is from a good friend.

#Please don’t invest in baby walkers. They ruin the shape of your little one’s legs. Many of the bow-legged children you see around you are victims of these contraptions.

#Resist the temptation of taking pictures of your little ones without their clothes. Spare a thought for the poor kid who will cringe in embarrassment later on. And maybe even hold it against you for the rest of his life.
I’m not even going into the bit about when these pics get into the wrong hands.

#Sleep is very important. A schedule even more so. A child who sleeps & wakes up on schedule is a happy kid [most of the time].

#Tantrums can be avoided 85% of the time if the parents are alert. Take the child away immediately from the cause of discontent and distract him with something else. DO NOT allow the child to wallow in his misery thinking you are teaching him a lesson. All it serves is to make him more stubborn.

#Be extra careful when you use words like ‘No’, ‘I don’t know’ and ‘Go get it yourself’. Before you know it they’ll be repeating it back to you….and in the same tone;-/.

On the same topic…..we all know how fast they pick up phrases like ‘Shut up’ ‘get out’ and ‘I hate him’ or ‘he's lying’. Instead of yelling at them uselessly, teach them to substitute the same with ‘Keep quiet’ ‘please leave’ and ‘I don’t like him’ or  'he's not telling the truth'. You may have to repeat this a few times but once they get the hang of it our ears are spared.

And the last life-saving tip….

#Never, I say never teach your toddler the correct word for a ‘private part’ of the body. Use a nickname, codeword or refer to it as another bodypart. This tip will save you from embarrassment more times than you’ll be able to count.

There’s more but I’ll get off while the going is good. I get the feeling some of you are already looking at me very disapprovingly.

Once again, I don’t claim to be any expert; these are some things which worked for me and I’m sharing them with you. Feel free to discuss, argue and add your gyaan on how it worked for youJ.

30 comments:

  1. Nice tips for new and expectant mothers... probably, I can visit this page once more when the time comes ;) :P....

    When I read the intro of your post I felt this post will not be of interest or relevance to me :-)

    You expressed these serious tips with a tinge of humour which made it interesting for me to want to read it.

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    1. Heyyy...long time, good to see u Tan:-))!!!
      Glad u liked it;-D.

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  2. Na na! I did not look at u disapprovingly at all :P

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    1. But I'm looking very disapprovingly at ur comment and u knw why;-/

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  3. Spot on :)
    I have a one year old daughter and I was nodding my way all through your post.
    Please put up a part two for the benefit of learning from shared gyan people like me :)

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    1. There is no part 2;-o
      I was exhausted by the time I finished part 1...err I meant this post itself. There were so many gaps...I seem to have forgotten how I brought my kids up;-D

      Thanks for commenting:-))!!!!!

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  4. Ok, here goes one more which I learnt the hard way - sleep when your baby does, that may be the only peaceful time that you get. Leave your house a little dustier, the kitchen a little dirtier and yourself a little messier, it doesn't matter much in the grand scheme of things :-)
    Thanks to you I have a new name for my daughter - Mariah Carey :P

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    1. @sleep - U knw thats just something I cdn't do...those moments when baby slept were really precious and I never wasted it sleeping. I wd take read, surf, do crosswords, call my friends up...everything except sleep;-D.
      LOL@new name for daughter, seriously tell me abt it...I have 2 under my own roof;-D

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  5. Ha,ha. I can so relate to every tip you've mentioned:)
    And agree with Bindu, a messier, dustier house doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things, atleast that's the excuse I give myself and look away from the work that stares at me:)

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    1. Hehe..I was always a bit laid-back and was always of the opinion that a little dirt never killed anyone. Sometimes when the kids picked food they dropped fr the floor and ate, my mil & H freaked but I firmly believed they got their multi-vitamins & immunity thata way;-D

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  6. what a god send, i am sending them for my grandson:)

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    1. Gosh Renu u r scaring me;-D.
      Great to see U!!!!

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  7. :D As I was reading this post and I was going.. me too, I did this and this and this and it worked for me.

    Also, I say go with your gut instincts on a few things. And for people who don't think with their gut, well they should then listen (verbatim) to their mum or MIL without any malice.

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    1. I agree with the last bit...I was a complete novice and was very grateful for all the help I received even tho it made me feel inadequate sometimes. I just kept quiet bcoz in the end my child benefited:-).

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  8. Benjamin Spock, Miriam Stoppard, and now N.A :)

    Bow to thee, O' expert.

    Thankfully, I don't have to worry about this anymore :):)

    ReplyDelete
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    1. *N bows back lower than R did & more solemnly*...see I know enough Chinese etiquette to save myself from getting carried away with all your fulsome compliments:-D.
      And I share the same pheelings of thankfulness as U;-P.

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  9. Nancy I so know these things ! :D I used a walker though, on which he sat for like 2 days ( 20 rials gone down the drain) and when the time came walked on his own...now we are trying to sell the damn thing and there are no takers in Oman :-( All the other points - so true and especially about following a schedule for the baby - happy babies guaranteed!

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    1. It's a fact of life that when we try to sell stuff there is no value for it at all but we go to buy even 2nd hand stuff are twice the price;-/.

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  10. Woooooooaaawwww!! Mast they tips!! Keep them comingggggggg

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  11. huh.. baby gyaans... i dont have any...

    Chech, u r being missed!

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    1. No need to worry just yet, experience will automatically bring the gyaan;-D

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  12. i can't believe you still remember everything! very good tips. took me back some..

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    1. Even I didnt think I knew all that much but when I was helping my friend out it all came back;-D

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  13. You made me bring forth memories of days 16 years back in my life, where I used to watch my mom and grandmom use all their wisdom in bringing up their grand and great-grand kid. ( my son). They made me feel so inadequate most times with their love and care for my son, and i dont think they even noticed. :-) I am sure was lucky to have not just one but two experienced hands at my service.

    Today I wish some one gave such quick and easy tips in dealing with a teenager. :-) :-)

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    1. Wow.....u were really blessed to have both ur mom & grandmom with u at that stage. I wanted to say lucky but lucky is so inadequate, blessed is the word:-)).
      Hahahaaa....teenagers are given to us to test our mettle; so we grin and bear it;-D.

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  14. Welcome back Nancy :) Will bookmark your tips for use in future..umm, don't know what else to write. I actually didn't know baby walkers are capable of changing the shape of baby's legs. Ouch.

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    1. Yes it does..extended use of it makes tiny legs go bow shaped. It happens when the both parents work & maids just leave the kids in these walkers the whole day:-(. But most of the parents are aware now & are more careful.

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  15. Great tips, especially the tantrum one and the one where they repeat what you say and how you say it. I really need to pay attention to the second one bcoz listening to my darling girl talk sometimes I've realised I can be one bossy b*tch :(

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    1. Hahahahaaaa...same here, I kinda didn't like myself too;-P. While its cute & all, we have to nip it in the bud huh;-D

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